Tuesday, February 17, 2009

I'll be ok in time

This past week was pretty rough. I do really good and then I'll breakdown. It's pathetic I know to be saying all of this, but I really did feel like my heart was ripped out of my body and left in the snow. Ok that is an overexageration, just trying to get the point across and pretend that I can spell overexageration. It wasn't that bad, but tell my heart that when I was crying myself to sleep, 4 freakin nights in a row. No one knows that. No one will know that. Besides mom and the blogging world now. It's hard to be around him and her. I would say names but they've been mentioned already and there's pictures. I'm protecting the innocent! Your welcome. :)

It doesn't help that they're both my best friends. I can't not hang around them because I love them so much. Even when it's just us three and I start to feel like a third wheel, they pull me back in because they know, to an extent, how I feel. He's leaving in October to go on a road trip across the country. He could be gone as little as a month up to 8 months. I won't waste this time being hurt and not be around him because I won't be able to soon.

So all of that to say that, yes, I am still hurting and sometimes I feel like I can't go on. But they are my best friends and they would never do anything to intentionally hurt me. Life just happened.


Brenda said...

Aw Chels, I hate that you're hurting like that. Maybe you should try and stay away, do something without them. Hang out with your other friends. I don't know. I do know, your life isn't over, that's for sure. And a month, or two or a year from now you'll look back and see it entirely different.

Amber said...

I'm sorry Chelsie,
Remember we dont always like or understand why God plans things the way he does. My guess, is God needed to make room in your heart for your one true love.
Someone "perfect" for you will come, but probably not untill you expect it the least.
Love you!!!