Don't yell at me! I know that it's been a looong time since I last blogged and I have no excuses. Slap my wrist and forgive me please :)
Today was a pretty weird day. I had a bit of a breakdown and through my tears I started crying out to God. It turned into a lot of questions and one answer..but I'll get to that in a minute. Have you ever tried to comprehend why Jesus did what He did for us? I mean, really, He chose to die for us; for me, for you. I could go very deep in all of this but I'm trying to keep it a little simpler, as hard as it is right now. God knew what I would do before I was born. He knew what choices I would make. He knew that I would make bad decisions and choose the wrong path completely and then He knew when I would turn around and come home, earnestly seeking His help and forgiveness (think prodigal son). Yet, in all of this, He still chose to die for me. I started thinking about it like an actual marriage. If I was married and chose to cheat on my husband over and over and over again, obviously after countless times my husband wouldn't want to be apart of it anymore. He would most likely divorce me and, hopefully, forgive me, but we wouldn't stay together. So how is it that the God of the universe, Who knew every choice that I would make and every time I would hurt Him, still die for me? My mind cannot wrap around this thought and I know that I'm overthinking all of this. It wasn't meant to be complicated and yet we overcomplicate it.
So, through my tears and questions I heard the Father, the Almighty, the Lover of my soul say a very simple thing in answer to my question of why and how......
Because I love you.